Oh what a sunrise this morning. And what a morning it has been. I groggly woke up and instantly realised it was unnervingly light outside. Between opening my eyes and reaching for my phone to see the time, my stomach seemed to disappear. 7:40, it read. And I won't repeat the next word that came out of my mouth. You see, that is the time that I need to leave the house.
Thanks to the wonder of lighting speed showers and wonderfully efficient mothers, I was out of the house at 7:58. Coffee in hand.
This whole time, I was muttering to myself, 'I can't believe I forgot to set my alarm last night....God, why? You know I love waking up and having time to get ready....And read with You over breakfast' (that last comment might have been my foolish attempt to guilt trip God....bad move, even if it is true). Cause you see, I do love it. Especially when I'm stressed and lacking sleep.
It was as my face hit the frosty air with a snap and I saw the breathtaking sunrise that He began to speak. First, it was a whisper of His delight in delighting me with beauty. Then, as I walked (ran) to the station, the tones became more distinct....'I'm faithful.' As I stood on the platform, I remembered what I had prayed the night before. The stress was illogically creeping up on me again, closing my thoughts and making my heart do odd things, my whole body tensing up. As I was about to turn off my light, I had cried out, 'Lord, You know how hard it's been for me to fall asleep lately....please, You are faithful. Remind me? Please, I know I can't make this go away, so I'm just going to have to choose to trust in You. Please help.'
I asked to be reminded of His faithfulness.
So, as I am sitting in a crowded, commuter-filled train on a normal Wednesday morning, the God of universe, space, and time, has chosen to draw near to me and remind me of His goodness and faithfulness towards this fumbling daughter. He woke me up. God was my alarm clock today. So the answer to my queries about why He'd take away my usual time with Him? A smile. A smile comes from His face as He says, 'I wanted to reveal my nearness in a new way. I've got you. Safe and secure.'
The knowledge of His love towards me is too great for 8:38 am. He never changes and He never fails. Great is His love and faithfulness. My doubting, anxious heart has been quelled and calmed. Quieted in the sea of stillness, trusting once again....on that journey of trust....it is constant, yet full of beautiful sunrises of God's unchanging, never ending loving-kindness.